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We're All A Little Mad Here

  • me at 11pm: oh it's getting late i should sleep soon
  • me at 4am: FEW TIMES BEEN AROUND THAT TRACK SO IT'S NOT JUST GONNA HAPPEN LIKE THAT CAUSE I AIN'T NO HOLLA BACK GUUUUUUUUUUUUURL

narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

(via satan-moffat)

wellheyproductions:

the-average-gatsby:

the-average-gatsby:

imagine a horror movie where you’re trapped in your house with a serial killer but all your lights are clappers

so you’re running for your life from this psychopath while both of you are just aggressively clapping the lights on and off

out of all my 3:00 AM ramblings you guys decide to make this one popular

Let’s make this situation even better. Both of you are wearing TAP SHOES, and all of the floors are hardwood.

(via aphoenixlament)

jamsoftheday:

Then I see you, you’re walking ‘cross the campus
Cruel professor studying romances

(via forty-five-rpm)